Song of my heart!!

Song of my heart!!

The feelings the emotions running and playing inside the mind is a very complicated composition of life. Like a concert going on forever, since the moment of first knowing oneself, never stops, just changes and ups and downs in the tune. But that is what it is, a part of being alive, being awake, that tune is the only thing that making this life a nice one. The happy tones the melancholy ones the sad ant sweet notes, the love tone, everything is making this a life, more than a living organism. Closing the eyes the heart can go millions of miles away and can feel thousands of feeling inside, all of this because we are alive, not only physically but mentally as well.

But the tunes stumbles, fade away sometimes, with so many noises around the music of heart can easily be ignored, and with time it can totally be veiled. This happens with life too, some memories with a person can stay in a same manner but the person changes or become invisible, the feelings of that moment stands still till the last breath, that is the beauty of a moment, a perfect beautiful complete moment, like a perfect note in a music composition. The feeling of knowing someone is so unreal that everyone knows that in their heart still like to believe that they know. In a crowd still mind feels alone or sometimes being alone can feel so complete.

All is like a game of mind, the hide and seeks the beliefs and trust the minds connecting and disconnecting and the moments creating a memory all like violin music. The heart makes everything so simple that anyone can feel that they belong somewhere but the time never belongs to anyone. With a sudden incident everything known can be change forever, the feelings can go far away or change into a different theme. But still the ups and down of the notes of the music of life seems so sweet perfect, sad melancholy, and warm.

The song plays no more,

Hiding in other noises for so long,

Broken notes scattered all over the

Floor, waiting still, to be one again

A single song, once more to be heard,

Once more to be finished, the ending..

The ending is fading away……

More and more each day

Still I can hear the song of my heart….

What is true Faith?

What is true Faith?

"Reason is our soul's left hand, faith her right."

-John Donne

Life of a great man often ends in invisibility but after his departure he rise again and some people took more control on him than he ever had before. The same thing happens with god or the supreme creator of the worlds as we often describe that power, every religion circles around a supreme thought of explaining everything based on simple faith. Which is not bad really, because not thinking about the creation or destruction whatsoever is a way by what a man can live in peace just in faith. But more rituals and surrounded personal gain makes everything complicated, a spider web of faith and treachery, the god the power the main explanation then does not matter the agents running here on earth and their materialistic gains is what blinds a simple man, and with time he grows weaker and confused, and after a little time all he does not have is faith.

The organization is everywhere now a days, growing on based on faith and miracle and unnatural is what is taking the light of hope and faith from human mind.  When a person has to give some materials in exchange of a fortune or good life where is the self-belief in that? Or where is the belief of karma that only doing good will achieve good, not hopeless praying, or after doing something horrible paying someone to clean up the sin. The agencies are what making everything simple and everything corrupted.

My neighbor does not leave his home before praying to various god and goddesses, but every time forget to wear a helmet, one couple that I know praying for a long time for a child of their own, there been years, they want to be parents, but they are not still able to see the thousands of children in orphanage who needs a parent a home, their life is empty just like the couple’s home, but they don’t have the faith in their love and their power to make a life secure. They are lost they can’t find the child that they are looking for in a real world. That is the lack of faith.

When a own offspring do something bad everyone blames on fate or destiny or god, but when there is a chance to give a life to an orphan child they are scared of unknown blood, many people can easily manage to mess up their own kid than take a chance with others. So where is the faith that everyone is talking about? I am skeptic, always have always will be, some people don’t like that, I ask them to show me true faith, but true fate don’t need any proof or name, it is here everywhere, in this world, naturally, no supernatural or paranormal explanation is needed to find it. For me faith is doing direct work by believing oneself than spending millions of rupees in praying or materialistic cleanups for sins. Spending for a living being is much more holy than wasting on a fear or weakness. That is real faith may be........

Thinking of ants….

Thinking of ants….

I was thinking of ants lately, little creature insects but with an organized and complex society they live in, very similar to human societies. But something differs   from our society or our complex organization. They are primitive, act on their basic instinct, the plan set in their genes they act on that blueprint only, with rhythm and solid perfection. There is no place for errors or petty mistakes. We humans are way better evolved creature than little ants or a honey bee; we are made of logic, emotions, feeling of millions of number, own view, far more than a genetic blueprint. But our world somehow is full of errors and petty mistakes; the very emotion makes us different, some of them also make us terrible for a good social order. We evolved physically but in the matter of mental change we are so afraid to accept the nature’s basic rule of change, we just can’t evolve in that same rate psychologically. Believing something is more of an easy job than asking question that means leaving our comfort zone behind. May be we the humans also cannot live farther from our nest.

The society that one day our ancestors made or forced to make to survive the brutal world, now becoming a larger threat itself. The rotten roots the broken branches need a new tree a new thinking to regenerate to be fresh once more. The insecurity, the jealousy, the rage and anger is destroying all that once hoped for, instead of walking together as a group or a nest we are walking along and pretending to live in a social order. We are corrupting our environment, we are destroying our home just for nothing, some personal gain, little fun but we are constantly ignoring our natural instinct. The instinct of worship nature that may be sounds primitive but that is what nature needs us to be. May be a mix of little logic and advancement, with a little primal and natural instinct. Like ants a little bit.

Some of us really confused, in believing that they are way more realistic but just thinking for only a moment is not realistic it’s more like a foolish assumption that we can control everything. We are thinking ourselves as giants or as the best species that this earth has ever saw, but in reality to this universe we are nothing more than a lost ant or way smaller than that. The law of change in universe also lies in our natural blueprint but we are living in a noisy place to hear anything but a mechanical sound around us. Our basic nature our primal instinct is shutting down slowly, we are letting our guard down. Now our society our nest our home is unprotected.

We have many more advancement than a little ant society, but why I am still thinking of them, scares me sometimes, the motion of change is moving, I am afraid of being left behind with my society like some lost ants in the woods without a nest.

Life is a game of hide & seek

Life is a game of hide & seek

Life is nothing, but a game of hide and seek, the long lost family, feelings hiding behind fake words, seeking truth a common desire, but most of the times fails to get a true answer, all of us playing night and day this game of hide and seek. It is fun though seeking something new and hidden for a change, looking for lost feelings inside a beating heart, calling a long lost member of family to feel connected again, feeling all alone in a crowed and then only to find out that exactly there I belong. The game of loosing, and getting back something entirely new is brilliant. Heart always seeks out to the connected heart blood always able to find blood.

But pain is there, when all of a sudden you realize that all of that castle of hope, connection you building up the heart you are setting for is same time shattering, a beginning and end simultaneously happening behind our consciousness. That is life. I always looked for my scattered family, the hidden ones from my life, seeking out to them try to find a loving family to belong, want to get a simple answer why we cannot all live happy together, but in the same time I know the impossibility of that foolish desire, everyone wants the same but no one can get that, that is the main fun puzzling part of being too much human, feeling every emotion sometime makes us so cold and confused that we lost everything again for nothing real.

It is sad that I may pass right across someone from my family without recognizing them, but that is may be better sometimes, not knowing the person you can always made them wise, kind and loving, as soon you start to know better, look better, the hidden things comes out and all illusion breaks through. The game is fun while playing, the endgame is always messy.

Today life is all about speed, success and getting things done, after all of that only a tired heart breaths, without any emotion, just breath in and out, nothing matters, in this speed we are losing the little things behind, we are growing up too soon and the lost things we forgetting, small pebbles that ones I used to collect, the little shiny things I used to hide behind my desk all left behind little joy little smiles.

But sometime calling out to a long lost relation pays up, you can get more than you can ever wanted, little smiles little hopes wherever hidden before comes running toward you and suddenly you can find a little place where you belong. A little seeking in a lots of hidden life.